September 16, 2011


Amid all the frustration I find myself dealing with, I realize that I need to take some time and give credit where credit is due.

It has never been my intent to use my blog to vent. Too often I think we, parents of deaf children, feel that raising a deaf child is a constant battle. That it is me against the world!! As my daughter grows, those battles become less and less. The reason, a wonderful staff at a humble school.

My daughter attends the local state school for the deaf.  By many standards it is not the best school, but anyone can learn from the hard work and dedication of its staff and teachers.  We have been there for, almost 7 years. I have seen many changes, many improvements.

We have a remarkable and dedicated superintendent that believes in giving our kiddos the tools they need to be successful. She always makes time to listen to my concerns and follows up to see that things are taken care of. We have dedicated teachers who work long hours to find new tools and new ways to encourage and support these amazing children. They take pride in what they do knowing they are doing something meaningful. Yet are humble enough to know they can always improve.

I am forever grateful for all they have done. Not only for my deaf child, but my entire family. Their love and dedication will be forever in our hearts!!

September 14, 2011


(All the comments in grey I have actually heard from other parents. They have said much worse. Thankfully I am a nice person. And "shut-up" is a swear word in my home.)

My family attended a local car show a couple weeks ago. We allowed the children the use of the camera to capture their favorite vehicle. My oldest took the pictures head on. He wants to see the motor under the hood, or the motor sticking OUT of the hood. My second child takes pictures from the side of the vehicle. She wants a good view of the "pretty" car. My third child stands back at the corner of the vehicle to get a good shot of both the front and side of the car. My youngest, well, we're lucky if we know what the picture is of.

"Well, all non-oral deaf live on SSI."

Everyone has a different perspective on what is right and what is not. I would never thumb through those photos and tell my child their view was bad, or wrong. It is their view. Their decision of what is best. Their end goal is the same: to enjoy the picture later.

"I knew that if my child was going to learn to read, they had to know how to speak."

All parents have a vision, their perspective of what they feel is the best method for raising their deaf child. Even parents with the same philosophy on deafness will see different ways to accomplish their goal: having an educated, confident child, who feels loved. Comparing notes is not a bad idea, but accept that your views and opinions may not be shared. Support what works, and throw out what doesn't. Most of all, show respect.

"You can't have a meaningful relationship without a voice."

I appreciate your "concern" for my child. Lets keep in mind that it is, in fact, my child. I am not abusing her by not forcing her to speak. I am not neglecting her by not putting her hearing aids on everyday. She is not missing anything by living in a silent world. She is beautiful, educated, excels in math and sports. She makes people laugh, smile, giggle and feel good about themselves. She is confident. She is amazing. She is mine. 

"You can't get a good education at that deaf school." 

 We chose to raise her "deaf". Do I wish she could talk? Sometimes. But then I look at her, and she smiles, and I know she is happy!

"Your daughter really struggles sitting still. ADD right?"  
(let me point out that she does not have ADD, ADHD or Autism)